Rob (lonelymemory) wrote,
Rob
lonelymemory

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Real entry for the first time in a while

I worry about whats going to happen to me constantly. I havent slept very well lately. I am so excited about the spring, because its a new start. This semester has been so fucked up and i need to just start over. I am glad that I am so comfortable with myself lately and though the past few months have been really rough on me I am happy to make it through it. I know I wouldnt have made it in anyway if it werent for Amy being here with me every step of the way. I know I don't say it near enough, but I really appreciate her and am glad she's here. I have so much fear lately for the future and in the few months of being out, I see that the world is a completely different place for me. I feel discrimination that I never have before, but acceptance from some people for the first time.

On another note, I am terrified about going home. I dont know what that's going to be like. I love being here so much and I feel like I burned so many bridges, that I might have made myself miserable for a month. It will be awesome if my friend kimberly does come out from phoenix, but if not, I'll be so alone. I just can't wait to get past this month and then be done and not have to go home for a very long time. I'm just done with home I dont know where i'm going to end up in the long run, but I know it will not be in Berkeley Heights New Jersey and I am ok with that.
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